Dan Dyer

This is the story of how I asked Minna to marry me. Recorded 6-11-03

Trouble. I couldn't find a ring, well I did, I found hundreds of them, but they all looked the same and none were Minna-ish. We were leaving for Reno in 3 days and nearby Lake Tahoe would be the most perfect place to ask Minna to marry me, if she won't say yes because of me at least she'll say yes because of the Lake. But, without a ring I was deflated and had nothing planned for a proposal. And I couldn't think of anyway into tricking her to marry me. Maybe it just won't happen. Maybe there was a way to find the 'perfect' ring in three days and maybe there wasn't. I was about to find out. For the next two days I was unable to go to any stores but I lit up the DSL line with all sorts of fancy online jewelry stores. No luck. Only one day left. I stormed the mall jewelry stores and harassed a jeweler I knew personally. I couldn't find anything I thought was fitting. With one day left. There was no store with Minna's ring. I succumbed to the realization that looking sooner would have been nice. It was Thursday 8 am and I will board the plane with no precious metals in hand, well at least airport security would be easier. Reno was my only hope now.

In Reno I thought about proposing having no ring. The thought seemed ridiculous to me. A glimmer of hope lay on the horizon the night we arrived. My grandmother had offered her ring as a placeholder. I wasn't sure about the idea, but the lack of ring and the fact that I probably wasn't going to find a ring in Reno helped me to convert to the idea. OK I like the idea of my grandma's ring but lacked the inspiration for a highly thought out and clever proposal in so little time. What was I to do. Small prayers had dotted my life with requests for a solution and gratitude for this girl who was turning out to be the woman of my dreams. My brother's words randomly stung my mind with profound natural truth, "You'd better make it good because she'll talk about it the rest of her life". We laughed at the time he said it but now its truth rocked my conscience.

The days in Reno passed without incident. Only good times, graduations and beach days at Lake Tahoe. It was too difficult to sneak away to a ring store... she would know what I was up to. Then a chain of events started from which I was propelled into one of the greatest moments of my life. Sunday night at the request of Minna we were to drive up on the hill to the Reno Temple to see the sacred edifice and the magnificent city lights. Of course I had thought of asking her there, it was perfect. But NO... No, I wasn't prepared. No clever plot with a sparkly ending. No, my grandmother's ring probably wouldn't fit, and no, I hadn't written the perfect song. Heck I hadn't written any song. Most of all I wanted a song for her. She deserved it, patiently listening to all my well rehearsed songs of past girlfriends and lost love. No Minna rhymes had yet graced these times. No song with her name was found in the strings of my acoustic sound. I longed for a song and a ring. I must wait for one more day. I should be able to write a song in one night. We put the guitar in the car and were ready for our "temple and light night". I loved just singing impromptu songs to her and I would as usual tonight... but these songs were never good enough for a proposal of marriage. 'I should at least have the ring with me' I thought. No I will ask her tomorrow with a song. 'What about all those super romantic moments in Seattle, the ones where... if you only had a ring then...'. Like the time on the Burke-Gileman Trail, while riding a bike I pulled her on the skateboard by the hand in the pouring rain. No, I will write a song tonight and propose tomorrow. The car was ready and we had a CD of great romantic type songs to listen to. We drove away and put the CD in.

STING began to sing the most romantic song I had ever heard. 'Oh my' I thought 'this is going to be a very romantic evening, what am I doing!? I should have that ring.' but like the dummy I was... I kept driving. The song was My one and only love. I turned quiet. Minna noticed. 'I'm fine' I said. 'ok, just checking'. 'Dang it!' I said. 'I forgot my wallet' (ya right). Back at the house I found my mother on the phone. This was no time to be chitchatting. 'Mom, I need your full attention'... well, you know what they say about mothers. They know everything. That's why I want to marry Minna she knows everything... Except that my mom walked straight to her closet and brought out my grandma's ring, and a giant ring box. 'agh, the box is too big, I'll put it on my belt buckle prong' its so small it might fall out of my pocket. So there it was secured all the way to the temple. Mom's last words of wisdom as I shared my frustrations of not having a song and dance proposal, you don't have to ask her tonight if you don't want to. Just keep it with you in case.' - ' right' I thought,' I'll just be true to the moment' And she politely continued in her phone conversation with my sister without a hint of "ring" excitement. She was a great actress, and I had my "wallet", supposedly it was secure.
By the time we got there I had calmed down a bit but really had to go to the bathroom. The Temple grounds were locked and we sat on the terrace overlooking downtown Reno. It was most handy that the car happened to have a warm blanket to shield us from the breeze. I secluded myself to relieve the water pressure in my lower abdomen. The relief was welcome as I finished my business and buckled up... Buckle? hmm there was something I was supposed to remember about my belt buckle... GASP!' One feeling of pressure was relieved and I found myself overwhelmed with fear as I realized the 67 year old heirloom ring was missing. I CANNOT lose this ring, I looked around... I had no flashlight. It was by choice I picked this darkened corner of the earth to find relief... ...oh dear. I closed my eyes at the thought of having to feel for it on the ground where I had just been standing.
I said a prayer. 'Please help me to find this ring... clean'. 10 seconds later I spotted a glint of golden moonlight reflected from a circular object... and to my greatest relief it was a yard off in the direction my belt buckle was loosened, away from any mess. I would NOT want to find myself trying to be true to the moment with a messy ring nor would I want to explain it.

Relieved in many ways, I sat next to Minna. It was a nice night, perfect for a blanket, perfect for a breeze, perfect for a kiss, perfect for a song. I said to Minna 'Tell me something beautiful' she thought for a moment and started a paragraph about beauty, as she continued I zoned out and realized 'oh man, this is good' and my pulse increased. I started thinking about what I could say... I need to be true to the moment... how can I smoothly get the ring from my belt buckle without her noticing... I tuned back in to her. She really was saying beautiful things. I however cannot remember a single one. and I was at a loss for words. She continued and had started to tear up. The quote " there is no time like the present" rang out almost like I could hear it audibly. 'Can I play you a song?' I said. Yes of course.

I started to strum a bit. I said a prayer that this will be as good and as memorable as possible. I started an impromptu song and began to make up words. I sang a few romantic lines about us and then a line about how I wanted her to be my wife. She turned more directly to me and her mouth opened a bit, I had her full attention. I sang a few more verses about us being together forever. I sang a line about how she doesn't know is what I have in my pocket that was round and had meaning ( it wasn't in my pocket but trying to sing a line about a ring on my belt buckle didn't work). She covered her hand with her mouth and her eyes welled up. The song continued and the last line said I'll put my guitar down so I can kneel down. So I put the guitar down and got on my knee and proposed. It was so perfect and so amazing. All the prayers came through. and I didn't even need Lake Tahoe for her to say yes.

It's the greatest thing ever. I have asked Miriam Lovell Beard to marry me. She said yes. It is one of the best stories of all time.

We'll be getting married August 9th in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints Seattle Temple. We'll be having a reception the night before in Seattle and another one in Reno a week later.
Minna and I have lots of email addresses but hardly any postal addresses. Please send your postal address to either myself, dan@dyerweb.com or Minna, miriambeard@hotmail.com

-Right now Minna is loving her job at Trader Joe's where she is the sign artist, not just any artist, but THE sign artist, the people there love her work. She also works a few days a week at Red Robin. She is the most amazing artist and loves all her different projects that she gets to do. AND she's good at everything she does. She is a fabulous salsa dancer (I'm working on improving my salsa skills) and one time for a date she got this super good salsa guy to come to my house and give me a real salsa lesson. She has graduated from Western Washington in Bellingham with a degree in art and a teaching certificate, mostly she's just teaching me how to cook for now, and I'm not doing so bad, I made her this great grilled portabella mushroom salad that rocked. She lives in Bellevue, Washington and grew up in the Seattle area and in Utah. We love Seattle area and will probably stay here for a while. Please come and visit. We just signed papers for a sweet 1 bedroom place two blocks from the Kirkland waterfront.-
added 6-24-03